


Safe & Sound

by ShaqTheRipper



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Oneshot, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-28
Updated: 2015-03-28
Packaged: 2018-03-20 02:57:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3634083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShaqTheRipper/pseuds/ShaqTheRipper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's Satinalia in Kirkwall, and the recently orphaned Marian Hawke has only her friends to celebrate it with. Combining her sadness with a massive and hopeless crush on a certain apostate, it proves for a very interesting evening. Fluff, hurt/comfort. Oneshot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Safe & Sound

            _"Ships. Daisies. Alcohol. Anything. Think of anything other than that, dammit."_

            Marian Hawke was stuck. No matter what she did, the one thing she'd been trying to avoid most stayed at the forefront of her mind, like a bad memory in times of weakness. But Anders was no bad memory. On the contrary, Marian's heart pounded and felt warm whenever she saw him, and she was pretty sure the gassiness she had lately was related to this new attraction-maybe-love feeling, if not Isabela's cooking. Regardless of what it was, she didn't like the sick feeling of want in her stomach every time she saw his charming half-smile, and made it a point to avoid him.

            She wandered down the path to the Hanged Man from, taking random turns here and there to prolong the time she had until she was forced to see _him_. Varric invited her and their friends out for drinks to celebrate Satinalia. With the loss of her mother recently and Carver being shipped off to the wardens, she supposed Varric felt sorry for her. She was all alone now in her massive estate, not counting the dwarves who both shared a private corner. Living alone was not what Marian had hoped for in her life. She constantly found herself turning corners, breath caught in her chest from preparing to call for her mother before she realized she was gone forever. The only thing that had made her feel better lately was spending time in Anders' clinic, and now that was completely out of the question. Whenever she was in the clinic, he always seemed to find some scrape or bruise on her that he insisted on healing, pouring his mana into her for seemingly non-existent injuries. She passed it off as him being a grateful friend, but she couldn't talk away the flush in her cheeks and sharp intake of air whenever he rolled up her pants to examine a scrape on her thigh. His fingers on her felt like electricity. It was wonderful, but she was terrified at the prospect of rejection. She couldn't bare to lose someone else she cared about so soon after everything that had just happened. So it was with intense regret that Marian finally approached the doors to the Hanged Man and entered.

            "Marian!" She turned to see Varric waving at her from the other side of the room, having spotted her instantly. "Get over here! We've been waiting for you!" Marian reluctantly made her way over to the corner table, sitting in the only open chair and setting the lumpy sack she carried on the ground. Merrill gave her a sympathetic pat on the shoulder.

            "Oh, Hawke, just try to make the best of this. All of us care about you here." Merrill said quietly in Marian's ear. She offered a weak smile in response, which Merrill returned. She had been the most understanding during all of this, having been forced from her clan several years ago and left on her own.

            "Let's get this Satinalia started!" Varric exclaimed excitedly. He waved over the waitress, who just rolled her eyes at him. This didn't seem to bother him, as she shortly returned with several platters of food, and then with tall beer mugs filled generously. The table was cluttered with mounds of honeyed ham, roast beef, buttered peas, chocolate cakes, roast chicken, steamed carrots, broccoli, and mashed potatoes smothered in gravy. It was more food than Marian had ever seen in one place before. The friends all rushed to fill their plates with heaping piles of food, and for a moment it was utter chaos as everyone tried to feed themselves.

            The group munched contentedly and engaged in loud, raucous conversation. Isabela was trying to guess the color of everyone's smallclothes, and Fenris was teasing Anders upon finding out the story of his conscription to the wardens. Hawke sat quietly, picking at her yorkshire pudding in gravy with her fork. She noticed Anders glancing her way, and suddenly felt sick to her stomach. Apparently, it was more evident on her face than she realized, as she received another pat from Merrill.

            "Hawke..." Anders said suddenly, focusing on her. "Are you feeling well?"

            "This is good, Varric. Thank you for this." She said distractedly, trying desperately to change the subject. She saw Anders' eyes flash blue momentarily, and could feel the stare of Justice on her back as she turned away.

            "I would say ' _thank you_ ', Hawke, but you haven't taken a bite of your food." Varric said, gesturing to her dish with his fork. Her cheeks burned red with embarrasment, and she looked down at her feet. The table had gotten quiet suddenly as they all stared at Marian. She felt tears prick the corners of her eyes. ' _Maker, can't I do anything right?'_

            "Hey." Merrill put her arm on Marian again. "...I have gifts!" she said, the thought dawning on her suddenly. "That's... that's a thing you do for Santimus, right?"

            "It's 'Satinalia', daisy," Varric laughed, "but you're right." He glanced over to Marian, who was still shuffling uncomfortably in her seat, and cleared his throat. He reached behind him, producing a small parcel wrapped in brown paper and twine that he tossed to Marian. It landed in her lap and startled her. "This is for you, Hawke."

            "Thank you, Varric." she said, still wounded from his earlier comment. With a nudge from Merrill, she pulled the strings and unwrapped a small, handwritten book. She looked questioningly up at Varric.

            "It's the beginning of my new work, _The Tale of My Best Friend Hawke_." He laughed. "Don't take it too seriously. Your real gift is coming later on." He winked at her, and she felt her ears go pink. Marian heard the tinkling bell laugh of Isabela from the corner.

            "My dear, I'm sure you'll enjoy _this_ a bit more." she grinned, and tossed a rectangular box at Marian. She barely caught it, and lifted the lid off carefully. Isabela's cat-like grin made her uneasy.

            "Oh my-" Marian let the box fall to the floor in surprise. Isabela howled with laughter.

            "My, my, Hawke. You're blushing!" Isabela hurried over to her side and leaned over her shoulder, lifting the lacy harness out of the box along with...

            "BELA!" Marian shouted, trying to shove the glass dildo back in the box. Isabela was too quick though, and held it high enough for everyone to see.

            "Calm down, Hawke! _I'm_ the one who's responsible for this being here in the first place." She ran her hand through Marian's short hair, which seemed to stop her protest, though she wore a look of intense embarrassment on her face. "I just though that... well, whoever the lucky someone might be to shag _this_ prize-" she slapped Marian's ass, and she let out a surprised yelp, "-would perhaps get to experience more of her... well, _wild side_." Isabela winked at Marian. "I know _I've_ seen this kitten roar." she dropped the items back into the box, and walked back to her seat with a sway in her hips.

            "That was... Isabela!" Marian's face was nearly as red as the smudge of warpaint she wore across her nose. She hid her head in her hands. "It was just a one time thing!" she cried. The friends around her were busting up in laughter, and she decided that the best revenge would be to chuck a small, heavy parcel at Isabela's head. "That's your gift, asshole." she grumbled.

            Isabela caught it right before it hit her square in the forehead. She smirked as she unwrapped the gift, and caught sight of an ornate gem bracelet. Questioningly, she looked to her friend.

            "I made it from gems I've found over the past year." Marian mumbled. "Thought you'd like more pretty things." Marian didn't get to say anything else, as she found herself enveloped in an extremely tight hug, her face crushed into Isabela's ample breasts.

            "My dear Hawke..." Isabela started. Several moments later, she still couldn't find the right words to complete her sentence, so she conceded by kissing Marian on the forehead and slipping the bracelet on her wrist.

            The evening turned into a mess of gift giving, eating, hugs, and only minor injuries. Marian was amazed at her friends' kindness. She had received, in addition to the previous gifts, a bottle of wine from Fenris, a set of homemade teas from Merrill, a pair of sensible boots from Aveline, the Chant of Light from Sebastian (he ended up having given this gift to everyone- of course), and Anders had, following suit, given everyone a copy of his manifesto. She gathered her gifts, grateful for the love of her friends, but crestfallen that Anders hadn't thought she was worth anything special.

            ' _That's what you get for getting your hopes up._ ' she thought bitterly.

            The bag was heavy on her shoulder as she stood to leave, and she exited the Hanged Man quietly, heading in the direction of her lonely estate. She felt lonelier with each step she took. Certainly, the people back in the pub were her friends, but none of them could fill the hole she had in her heart for her lost family. Despite the love she had from her friends, Marian Hawke was truly alone.

            She cracked the door to her estate open, dropped the bag of gifts on the ground, the manifesto slipping out. She glared at it bitterly. Of course her feelings for someone else had to get involved. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Marian punched her desk in frustration, and yelped in pain. Mages weren't built for this sort of anger, she concluded. Marian chuckled quietly to herself, but froze when she heard movement behind her.

            "I- uh, I didn't mean to startle you."

            _Anders._

            He stood at her threshold, a small bag in hand. He looked apologetic and...well, Marian couldn't quite figure out what else. He took a tentative step forward. The bag jostled slightly as he moved.

            "I- well, I, uh." Anders scratched the back of his head nervously. "About the gift... I wanted to apologize."

            "What, your manifesto?" Marian asked.

            "That was more Justice's than my gift, if you understand my meaning." He took several awkward steps closer to her until he was perhaps a foot away. "I wanted to give you something real. Something from me." He held the small bag open, and Marian gingerly put her hand inside to retrieve a tiny gold hoop.

            "What... ah," Marian fumbled, not understanding the gift at all.

            "This," Anders carefully took the hoop from her hand "used to be mine. I had worn it back in the circle, as an attempt at pissing off the templars, I suppose. Since I've been in Kirkwall, I've had it out, but I miss it sometimes. This has been with me through the blight, through each escape attempt, my conscription, and every adventure until... Well, until this one." Anders looked at her, and she felt a wave of compassion overcome her. He reached up to her right ear and fastened the hoop in place. "I guess... this was an important part of me my whole life, and I wanted you to have it. You mean a lot to me, Marian."

            _Marian._ He had never called her by her first name until now. She did the bravest thing she could muster, and stroked his cheek gently with her hand. She wanted desperately to grab his head in her hands and kiss him deeply, but the pang in her heart made her afraid. He leaned into her touch and closed his eyes, savoring the feeling.

            "Anders, I..." Marian was distracted momentarily with Anders' honey brown eyes meeting hers. She felt the pang again. "I... Thank you. I'll treasure it always." She kept her eyes locked on his. He looked at her with so much emotion. It was so hard to pull back from his gaze. "Would you, uh, like some tea?" she asked quickly. She wanted desperately to keep him from leaving.

            "Not particularly." he responded. "But I would still like to spend some time with you now, if that's alright."

            "Of course." Marian responded, her voice small. She shuffled her feet, and decided to lead him up to her study. It was the only warm place in the house right now, anyway. Marian took her bag, and walked up the steps to her study carefully. As she entered, she immediately felt the heat of the warm fire she had lit earlier wash over her in a wave of comfort. She paused in front of the hearth to warm herself, and felt Anders' presence behind her as he approached. She closed her eyes in contentment, and felt his hand on her cheek, brushing away a stray hair. "What would you like to talk about?" She asked quietly.

            "Marian..." Anders scanned her face with concerned eyes. "I know this hasn't been easy for you." She shook her head quickly, her eyes on the ground. "It hurts me to see someone so dear to me in so much pain." He twisted a lock of her short hair between his fingers, and sighed. "I want... I want to be here for you." He pressed his forehead against hers and closed his eyes. Marian's heart leapt in her chest. Anders wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly to his chest, her arms hanging loosely at her sides. A loud sob escaped her mouth, and fat tears rolled down her cheeks.

            "Why is this happening to me?" Marian cried into Anders' shirt. "I just want them back." she lifted her arms to return the embrace and buried her face into his chest as she sobbed quietly. They stood like that for some time, and Marian finally pulled back to wipe her tears on the back of her sleeve. She sniffed and looked up to meet his eyes. He stroked her cheek lightly with his thumb, and offered a sad smile. "Anders, I..." she fumbled, and pulled away from him suddenly. "I can't."

            "What?" Anders stepped back in shock. "What do you..." the smile was gone off his face, and was replaced by an expression of hurt as his mouth hung open and his eyes were wide.

            "I didn't mean-" Marian reached out for his arm, but pulled away a moment later. She ran her fingers through her hair in exasperation. "I want to... Anders, I care for you immensely. I want to be around you all the time. Being around you makes me feel so wonderful and so happy, but I can't risk losing you. And now, like an idiot, I'm telling you that I'm hopelessly in love with you, and you're going to leave,  and I'll... and I'll-" she shook her head fiercely and squeezed her eyes shut to block out his face. "I'll be alone again!" She stepped backwards away from him, and knocked into a table and lost her balance. She fell onto the ground, and hid her face in her hands from shame. "Just leave me be, Anders!"

            "Did... Is that true?" he asked.

            "...What?" Marian raised her gaze from her hands to meet his eyes.

            "You love me?" his voice was quiet. She nodded in response. "Marian, I..." Anders dropped to the ground, and before Marian could process what was happening, he took her face in his hands and kissed her. She kissed him back, frantically trying to pull herself closer to him. The kisses were passionate and needy, and both of their faces were flushed by the time they parted.

            "I've wanted to kiss you for a very long time." he whispered, his lips an inch from her ear. A shiver ran down her spine. "Do you want me with you, Marian? Do you really want to be with a wanted apostate?" She chuckled.

            "Anders, _I'm_ a wanted apostate as well." She pressed a kiss to his cheek gently. "and yes, I want to be with you. I want you always."

            "Would you have me here? Living with you?" He raised his eyebrows questioningly.

            "Yes. Yes, a thousand times yes, Anders."

            "And so you have me, Marian." They held each other in a tight embrace. Everything was going to be alright.


End file.
